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Responding to Unscheduled Alien Visitors

Updated over 3 weeks ago

Occasionally, users may observe unidentified flying objects interacting with the platform. While surprising, UFO activity is generally harmless and rarely requires intervention unless they begin offering unsolicited upgrades.

Recognizing UFO Interference

You may be experiencing UFO-related system behavior if:

  • Icons drift slightly upward, as though attempting to achieve lift

  • Pages load in patterns resembling crop circles

  • Notifications appear in languages you don’t recognize, including but not limited to: Galactic Basic, Binary, or Extremely Polite Morse Code

  • A soft humming noise follows you from screen to screen

If any of the above sound familiar, congratulations—you’ve made contact with our “High-Altitude Ambiguity Protocol.”

Recommended User Actions

There are several acceptable responses when encountering UFO-based anomalies:

  • Attempt communication via gentle tapping or confident nodding

  • Offer the craft a compliment on its aerodynamic design

  • Take a screenshot (the UFOs appreciate documentation for their portfolios)

  • Ignore the event entirely; extraterrestrials respect boundaries

Please refrain from throwing your device skyward in an attempt to “join them.” This voids most warranties.

If the Visitors Become Inquisitive

Rarely, the aerial guests may attempt deeper interaction, such as:

  • Rearranging your app layout into constellation shapes

  • Beaming up your cursor temporarily

  • Displaying messages that begin with “WE COME IN…” and end in buffering

Remain calm. This is standard interstellar curiosity.

Final Notes

Most UFO encounters resolve spontaneously after the visitors realize they’ve taken a wrong turn near Saturn. However, if your experience persists for more than one lunar cycle, feel free to open a ticket—ideally not during an abduction.

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